Affiliate Marketing Secrets

From the secret scrolls of the Holy land….from the ancient masters of a desert land …comes the most alluring, most entrapping, most reality altering, Salvation Package ever.
It’s hypnotic
*Trumpets sounding*
It’s unbelievable
*Trumpets sounding*
It’s downright dangerous
*Trumpets sounding*
That’s right it’s The Salvation Station™ presents “Christianity Plus+®” …
It’s not just a religion …it’s spiritual entrapment. You’ll never know what hit you.
One sermon and your helpless; one dunk under the water and your theirs forever!
Although powerful mind altering substances have long been illegal, the opiate of the masses is now available in the Modern Form through a special agreement with the Bureau of Mind Control. that’s right “Christianity Plus+®” is both Government and Illuminati approved.
Try it; your life will never be the same again.
Are you tired the old religious stereotypes …?
like giving to the poor
curing lepers
defending the weak
fighting the powerful and unjust
That’s old hack my friend with the New Salvation Stations “Christianity Plus+®”, your free to claim back from the poor your rightful share … join forces with the evil oppressors …
So forget about tight jeans, forget about long hair, forget about push-up bras….
Remember, if you don’t use it to manipulate your way through life or better still into other people lives, someone else will!
Act now while there’s still time! “Christianity Plus+®” is available in a unmarked brown box and comes with a patch so you can wear your ignorance on your sleeve.
That’s right! a personal, versatile pocket Sky-Magician free!
Want more ?
The Salvation Stations™ “Christianity Plus+®” also comes with a reversible and versatile Hypocritical Shield …
Act Now ! Don’t Delay !
Pay as you go , with our easy payment plan … all you have to lose is your Integrity and Self worth …
*Please Note “Christianity Plus+®” may be exactly like any other organised religion on the market …
Can you think of any thing else I missed … ?
Don’t be shy …
Post Now !
Don’t Delay !

ow many men does it take to change a light bulb?
Two million, six hundred and twenty thousand, and ninety four.
1 to buy the bulb, change it and throw the old one in the bin
2000 to extract, ship, design and forge, deliver, market and sell the raw materials for the bin
5 to crew the wagon that carries the old light bulb away.
20 to man their refuse depot.
40 to man the landfill site that buries the old bulb
20 to wrestle the fundamental secrets of electricity from the universe
5 to invent the lightbulb after decades of trial, error, sweat, risk, insight and innovation
3 to design the particular style of bulb
100,000 to evolve the glassblowing process over millennia of tragic accidents and astonishing inspiration
2000 to design, inspect, approve, construct, secure, maintain and wire the building that the light socket sits in
500,000 to build and maintain the infrastructure that delivers energy to the light socket
1000 to build the factory that made the light bulb
5000 to man the supply chain of raw materials for it
1,000,000 to build their ships, trains and trucks
10,000 to tarmac the road and lay the tracks that the raw materials traveled over
1,000,000 to insure them all, and to never breathe a word about their loss
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? One
One to nag her boyfriend to buy the lightbulb. The same one to get him to drive her to the DIY store and wait while she takes an hour to choose the one she wants, then borrow the money off and never pay it back. The same one to expect him to drive her home and nag him to fit the bulb. The same one to complain it is too bright / dim / colourful / bland / over designed / under designed, to stage an environmental protest outside the landfill site, sue the builders for sexual discrimination, write a false history that marginalized the men who made it possible, and demand that everyone around her pays for her massively overpriced, self-aggrandising wedding. The same one to divorce him, steal all his earnings, shove him out of his children’s lives, manipulate the legislative process and its enforcers to entrench her position, falsely accuse the builders of sexual assault, claim all the credit for a reproductive process in which she is entirely passive and indulged, make self-serving assertions that everything would be far better if women had done it all, and to call all her friends to ***** about having to change the lightbulb without any support from her useless ex-husband.

ow many men does it take to change a light bulb?
Two million, six hundred and twenty thousand, and ninety four.
1 to buy the bulb, change it and throw the old one in the bin
2000 to extract, ship, design and forge, deliver, market and sell the raw materials for the bin
5 to crew the wagon that carries the old light bulb away.
20 to man their refuse depot.
40 to man the landfill site that buries the old bulb
20 to wrestle the fundamental secrets of electricity from the universe
5 to invent the lightbulb after decades of trial, error, sweat, risk, insight and innovation
3 to design the particular style of bulb
100,000 to evolve the glassblowing process over millennia of tragic accidents and astonishing inspiration
2000 to design, inspect, approve, construct, secure, maintain and wire the building that the light socket sits in
500,000 to build and maintain the infrastructure that delivers energy to the light socket
1000 to build the factory that made the light bulb
5000 to man the supply chain of raw materials for it
1,000,000 to build their ships, trains and trucks
10,000 to tarmac the road and lay the tracks that the raw materials traveled over
1,000,000 to insure them all, and to never breathe a word about their loss
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? One
One to nag her boyfriend to buy the lightbulb. The same one to get him to drive her to the DIY store and wait while she takes an hour to choose the one she wants, then borrow the money off and never pay it back. The same one to expect him to drive her home and nag him to fit the bulb. The same one to complain it is too bright / dim / colourful / bland / over designed / under designed, to stage an environmental protest outside the landfill site, sue the builders for sexual discrimination, write a false history that marginalized the men who made it possible, and demand that everyone around her pays for her massively overpriced, self-aggrandising wedding. The same one to divorce him, steal all his earnings, shove him out of his children’s lives, manipulate the legislative process and its enforcers to entrench her position, falsely accuse the builders of sexual assault, claim all the credit for a reproductive process in which she is entirely passive and indulged, make self-serving assertions that everything would be far better if women had done it all, and to call all her friends to ***** about having to change the lightbulb without any support from her useless ex-husband.

It is 2012. Wealthy seventeen year old teenage boy James Buckingham is returning by ship to America after vacationing in Europe with his father and mother. They have also brought along pretty, wealthy girl Jessica Simpson. James is the son of a huge businessman and stock market player, Joseph “Joe” Buckingham, who is of European aristocratic descent and American socialite lineage, and Katherine “Kate” de Grey, who herself is the daughter of an aristocratic mother and wealthy father. Jessica Simpson is the daughter of a potential business partner of Joseph’s. Joseph and Katherine want their son to marry Jessica because they are secretly suffering from financial difficulties.
James is very depressed. Not only are his parents putting huge pressure on him, he also has a deep secret he is hiding from the world around him, from the paparazzi and media and high society: he is actually gay. James couldn’t bear the narrow-mindedness of his world, and on the second night of the journey back to New York, he couldn’t hold it in any longer. He attempts to commit suicide by jumping off the stern of the ship.
“Don’t do it,” a voice says. James turns and sees a beautiful, yet working-class-dressed boy about his age. James threatens to jump, despite being slightly disoriented from the creature. He feels something brewing inside of him…eventually the working class boy introduces himself as Kevin O’Connor, aged 18. “Wow, Iike your style,” he says, pointing at James’ outfit of a matching Marc Jacobs couture wool coat, a dark blue and white colour block shirt and tan corduroy trousers with smart brown Bontoni dress shoes. James says “thanks, you too” admiring Kevin’s hoodie and jeans with Nike sneakers.
The two soon develop a strong bond. James decides to meet up with Kevin from third class and they talk, and eventually James brings Kevin to dinner with him, much to the dismay of his mother, father and Jessica. Jessica already has a part of her that suspects James of being not so straight.
After the dinner, Kevin brings James to a third class party with his friends, and they party hard all night until two in the morning when the two boys split up. They discover a mutual interest in Kpop, a small yet rising music genre and sing Sooweul Neul Malhebwa together.
The next day, however, James’ mum warns James not to talk to Kevin. James is then confronted by Jessica, who tells him that she loves him a lot, and hugs him. James decides to avoid Kevin, but eventually gives up when he sees a little boy being scolded by his mother for acting in a feminine manner. He approaches Kevin who is chilling at the bow of the ship, and Kevin takes James up and holds him on the railing. “Soowuneul malhebwa, Jamie?” he says playfully (Tell me your wish is korean) James gives a light giggle and says, “My Soowun?? My soowun is..” he looks deep into Kevin’s eyes, and they kiss for the first time.
Later, the two boys go into James’ room. Kevin is intruged at the luxury of James’ room, and over James’ luxurious, fashionable high fashion clothes. James playfully asks Kevin to do him a photoshoot – a nude photoshoot.
They then almost get discovered by James’ father’s valet, and playfully run away from him. The two enter a Lamborghini in the storage area and passionately make love. They almost get discovered and leave and they kiss. However, at that moment the ship is punctured by a rock and starts to sink. James is split from Kevin, and Jessica tries to force James into a lifeboat. James refuses and goes to Kevin. His parents leave without him and scream after him. Jessica follows the two lovers and tries to force James into another lifeboat with her.However, James jumps back out to reunite with Kevin, and the two eventually go into the water with the ship. Kevin tells James that he must live on and never let go, and James promises. Kevin is frozen to death.
Eventually James changes his identity to Jamie O’Connor and lives a free life battling for homosexual rights. In the 2020’s he comes a Kpop idol after Kpop’s global domination, and he also does a variety of other things such as flying in a rocket. Homosexuals are finally accepted. He dies at the age of 117 in 2112.

The email I received:
Thanks for answering my question. I am very much happy to read back from you so soon. Actually, i will be willing to provide these babies/baby to you, which you will be responsible just for the shipping fee.For you to have one puppy ship to your location, will cost you $185,and the shipping fee of 2 will be $360. These babies will be delivered right at your door steps, in an electronic crate, play toys, and work papers. And if the shipping fee is made available now, then you are going to get the babies delivered to you, in about 6-7 hrs time. And as soon as you make the shipping fee available, i will take the puppy/puppies right away to the shipping company for them to be ship to your location.And as soon as i am done at the shipping company, they are going to email you, with the flight details and the bill number ok. We are not selling these babies/baby,but rather looking for a loving home to provide him or her with love and care ok. So,if that is ok by you, we will need your full contact home address, where you will like the puppies/puppy to be delivered.
Full Names……?
Country………..?
State……………?
City………………?
House Address…………?
Cell Phone Number #……..?
Zip Code…………………?
Nearest Airport…………….?
With all these details, will help me to fill the delivery form at the airport, and also help the shipping agent, who will be the person to deliver the puppies/puppy at your home, tress out your location for the delivery. Make sure that, as soon as you send the money, be at home in other to pick him/her up ok. Let me give you this secret that i use for my pets,You can boost your pet’s health profoundly by making one simple decision. All you have to do is change his diet from commercial-brand fare to something you may never have imagined giving him:real food.The fresh food you buy at the market for yourself is the food you should give your pet, too.”i feed my puppies with Fresh food. Fresh chicken and turkey and beef. Fresh raw vegetables and fruits. Fresh brown rice and oatmeal. Fresh yogurt,eggs, and cottage cheese,they do not shed..So i will be waiting to read back from you soon.. Thanks.
God Bless You.

I am going on a Carnival Cruise out of Baltimore soon. I have been on two other Carnival cruises out of Florida (Fort Lauderdale, and Orlando/Port Canaveral) Anyways before you get on the ship they scan your luggage, sort of like an airport. Where can I find the dimensions of the biggest suitcase that can fit thru the scanner. In Fort Lauderdale our biggest suitcases were able to fit thru it. But in Port Canaveral we ended up having to put all the same suitcases in the bins, where the tenders put them on the ship. The thing about that is your suitcases can come as late as 9pm, which is a long wait, plus you have the risk of stolen items, since Carnival is not affiliated with them in anyway. Where can I find the dimensions of the biggest suitcase that can go thru the scanner…. That way it would be easier/nice to know, than having to wait and see if it fits in the metal crate? I might also get a smaller suitcase instead.