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How Do You Help Your Child Follow Their Religious Explorations If You Are Atheist?

My son is quite impressionable, and he has shared with us quite often his tender musings about god and what he associates himself as being (Christian Nondenominational). So, I intend to fully support his right to worship, but I refuse to go to church myself. He is 12 years old, so naturally, I asked him to speak to his friends who attend church and ask their parents if he can attend with them. I told him most religious people would be glad to have a guest come to their church. So far, he has not followed through. We have bibles in the home, but he doesn’t read them. I really think he should read the bible and see what he is choosing to believe in, but he doesn’t seem compelled to do that either. Since I am not pushing anything on him or restricting him from anything, I don’t know where he is getting all this religious fervor from, but I would like to see him think about things more instead of jumping into murky tanks of water. How do you do that gently? For example: Yesterday at the dentist’s office while waiting to be seen, my son has this dialog with me (the atheist mom):
“Mom, look at this picture (Some place in BFE, Texas, it just had a cross on it) is this where Jesus died?”
“I don’t feel qualified to answer such a question, son. But I would have to rationally guess, no.”
“Mom, do you know when Jesus is coming back?”
*I cringe*
“Um, I think you should ask a religion professional that question. But keep in mind, humans are prone to make errors with predicting the weather, and they have meteorology schools to teach this skill. I don’t think we can accurately predict a thing like that if it is so.”
So…you see some of my problem. Then most of my family are hardcore fundamentalists and I don’t want to expose my son to that. The friends I have that are “Christian” are unaffiliated or loosely affiliated and they don’t do church. What would you do in my situation?

No Responses to “How Do You Help Your Child Follow Their Religious Explorations If You Are Atheist?”

  1. FROG E says:

    Let him go to church with his friends

  2. Alex the Awesome says:

    I would read up on all religions, sit him down and teach him them. After he has learned about every religion in an unbiased manor, I would allow him to make his own decision. If he chooses Christianity, let him go to church with his friends. If he chooses Islam, bring him to a mosque. You get the idea.

  3. Sly Phy says:

    12 year old children will believe any old rubbish. The problem arises when they don’t come to their senses as adults. The problem belongs to both the person and the world as a whole.
    Religion is utter rubbish.
    Ask him why he doesn’t believe in the magic Santa does but does believe in the magic Jesus does?
    – Yes lee, a blasphemer I surely am, and proud of it 🙂

  4. shart of turin says:

    Subtle discouragement through frank answers like ‘I’m not familiar with that part of the Jesus myth, son’ or “christian mythology is so contradictory and confusing that it’s hard to keep up.”

  5. Carlos K says:

    >Mom, do you know when Jesus is coming back?
    Qualified or not, I don’t quite understand why you couldn’t explain “I believe his return is a myth.”
    Added: you made it seem he asked your opinion. Your beliefs are valid too. He wanted to know what you thought.

  6. Atheist says:

    Well, it doesn’t seem you know much about Christianity, otherwise you could have honestly answered “The Bible says Jesus died in the middle east” The answer to the other question “No, I don’t know when or even if Jesus is coming back…” Maybe you should pose questions to your son? Something simple like “well, what do you think?”
    The only other thing to do is to take him to church.

  7. David N says:

    Actions speak louder than words.
    If you want to help your child explore, go to church with him — even if you don’t believe.
    You may want to keep an eye out for churches with the strongest youth groups and lean in that direction. i.e.; PEER SUPPORT.
    Children follow the example of their parents a lot better than what parents merely say.

  8. The Loner says:

    don’t be a drum beater like christian parents. Let him explore religion on his own, but be sure to teach him about other faiths/belief systems so he isn’t blindly influenced by his friends and their parents. Teach him to keep an open mind

  9. Tiny says:

    There is a website that I think your son may enjoy. It contains a lot of information to help the whole family get to know God. It also contains information for teens and problems they face in life. Maybe you can check it out first and if you think it might be helpful to your son then you can show him the website. The web address is http://www.jw.org

  10. harperta says:

    Take your son to the nearest Unitarian Universalist congregation. You might even like the place yourself. The UU church does not have a ‘creed’ or ‘doctrine’ and everyone is encouraged to explore and follow their own spiritual path. There are many atheists within our congregations, some have even become ministers. For more research, check out the church website: http://www.uua.org. The teachers of the classes there can either answer your son with reasonable, non-faith-based answers or direct him to books or websites that can.

  11. ? says:

    Your kid: “Mom, do you know when Jesus is coming back?”
    You: “Who told you he’s coming back?”
    Your kid: “Some dude at school”
    You: “Then why didn’t you ask this dude?”
    Your kid: “Because he doesn’t know either”
    You: “Then how did he know he’s coming back?”
    Your kid: “Some other dude told him”
    You: “Good, then go ask this other dude and repeat the process.”
    Your kid: “No one seems to know”
    You: “Good. By now, I hope you realize many idiots out there simply repeat what they are told to believe. Hope you’re more intelligent than these idiots.”

  12. Denver says:

    Give them a Bible.

  13. johnno says:

    Ask him to pray for you.
    In the meantime it would be good for him to visit
    with his friends. He would get some answers to
    his questions that way.
    You said you have Bibles in the house, so it’s a
    good idea to let him know some basics about a
    quick source of answers to a lot of his questions.
    Tell him Christianity details are found in the New
    Testament. The first 4 books in the NT (gospels)
    are all about Jesus – especially the book of John.
    The one after John – Acts – is about the very first
    churches that began after the original one started
    in Jerusalem. It describes what they were meant
    to do .. compared to the many added on rituals,
    dogma and funny hats that we often see now.

  14. peter says:

    just let him have fun with it he doesnt have to understand it all at that age. the fact that your an atheist and you let make his own mind up. shows something rare on your part. your a good enough parent by at alone so im sure it will be fine.

  15. Lee says:

    Never try to stop your son going to church he is on the right path encourage him to follow it let him go to church with his friends also do not listen to “sly py” he is an utter blasphemer

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