Categorized | Featured Articles

Why Do People Want To Affiliate, And Why Don’t I?

I’m not sure why there are so many who are desperate to affiliate with others–to make friends, to fit in. I can understand from some point of view why that’s a natural human drive–it makes sense in an evolutionary context–but it’s not something I’m inclined to do. Although others like me, and I have perfectly competent social skills and physical looks, I always back out of any possible friendship with anyone, since I see no point to it, unless it’s for business. I really don’t care about personally knowing people who might be like me. I wouldn’t want to hang out with me; one of us would end up murdering the other at some point for some practical reason.
I’m getting really tired of people wanting to be friends with me. I keep trying to withdraw, but they treat me like I’m their buddy and want to do things with me, which I do not care for with any person. I’ve heard people take pleasure in companionship, but I don’t seem to. I act on my own and achieve what I want on my own. If I need a business relationship, I’ll make one, but I don’t make friendships for no real reason, or as an end in itself.
So what’s up with me? My parents are starting to lose it. I’m 24, and they’re always talking about how schizoid I am, or how I’m in denial about my desire to affiliate. I’m being honest when I say I don’t take pleasure in having things in common with others, or spending time with others. I don’t consider myself socially incompetent or that I’m unable to act social when necessary, but it’s never because I want to, and is for someone else any time I do it. I’m not shy or timid, and can approach people readily without a problem. It’s not a self-esteem thing; my self-esteem is fine, and I’m generally satisfied with things and myself. Others aren’t; they want me to be more social and outgoing, but I have no desire to. My father’s getting more and more frustrated as time goes on and I continue to lack interest in any kind of companionship or long-term relationship. How is that possible that I don’t feel the same way he does?

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Categorized | Featured Articles

Why Do People Want To Affiliate, And Why Don’t I?

I’m not sure why there are so many who are desperate to affiliate with others–to make friends, to fit in. I can understand from some point of view why that’s a natural human drive–it makes sense in an evolutionary context–but it’s not something I’m inclined to do. Although others like me, and I have perfectly competent social skills and physical looks, I always back out of any possible friendship with anyone, since I see no point to it, unless it’s for business. I really don’t care about personally knowing people who might be like me. I wouldn’t want to hang out with me; one of us would end up murdering the other at some point for some practical reason.
I’m getting really tired of people wanting to be friends with me. I keep trying to withdraw, but they treat me like I’m their buddy and want to do things with me, which I do not care for with any person. I’ve heard people take pleasure in companionship, but I don’t seem to. I act on my own and achieve what I want on my own. If I need a business relationship, I’ll make one, but I don’t make friendships for no real reason, or as an end in itself.
So what’s up with me? My parents are starting to lose it. I’m 24, and they’re always talking about how schizoid I am, or how I’m in denial about my desire to affiliate. I’m being honest when I say I don’t take pleasure in having things in common with others, or spending time with others. I don’t consider myself socially incompetent or that I’m unable to act social when necessary, but it’s never because I want to, and is for someone else any time I do it. I’m not shy or timid, and can approach people readily without a problem. It’s not a self-esteem thing; my self-esteem is fine, and I’m generally satisfied with things and myself. Others aren’t; they want me to be more social and outgoing, but I have no desire to. My father’s getting more and more frustrated as time goes on and I continue to lack interest in any kind of companionship or long-term relationship. How is that possible that I don’t feel the same way he does?

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Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

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