Tag Archive | "being friends"

Should I Even Trust This Girl, After She Was So Vicious To Me?


My impression of her from facebook and skype over the summer from our university class facebook group, was that she was some nice, innocent girl but also very naive and not that street smart.
What i didnt know, was how much of a mean, vicious girl she really is.
Beginning of this school year, Taylor, Kyle and I were best friends.Taylor lived on the main campus, but Kyle and I lived downtown in university affiliated housing that barely anyone from my college lived in. So Kyle and I saw eachother way way way more than Taylor, especially since we lived across the hall from eachother. But Kyle and I got closer and closer until we started being physical and nearly had sex and stuff. I had real feelings for him and he said he did too. But we got into an argument and broke up. (it wasnt even face to face either….its complicated) after the breakup i spent a lot of time with Taylor
Ten days after the breakup (when he had no contact with talyor for like 2 weeks because he was never really thattt close with her), Kyle invites himself over to Taylor’s dorm….at 1 am….so he takes the subway like 25 minutes to go to her dorm. Taylor messages me saying “Kyle’s coming over” and of course, she doesnt say “no” when he invites himself. And he stays the night. He slept on the floor but still…taylor texted me in the morning saying “he stayed the night. lmao” i was so pissed off.
Then Taylor and kyle become close friends and hang out all the time… (Taylor liked him. i knew she liked him from the start even when he and i had our thing)
I started being close to Taylor’s roommate Maria, but she would be like “faq off. shes MY friend!” to Maria. Taylor was VERY possesive of friends. She would say all these mean things about Maria to everyone. It was awful…
Taylor then told me on facebook chat that our friendship was over. She accused me of being a bad friend for choosing Maria over her. I never did this…i tried being friends with both. But she just called the friendship off.
Taylor and her friend Kayla made a list of the reasons they love and hate Kyle. Number one on their list of hate was “cuz he hooked up with Melissa…ewwww” and then a girl walks into the room and goes “hooked up with who?” and Kayla goes “some slut” so apparently they think of me as a slut….when all i did was make out with Kyle…a lot of times!! I never even touched his penis or anything. I always kept my clothes on too! whatever….they are crazy….
number two on the hate list was “cuz he gives everyone mono” (i had thought Kyle might have given me mono,because i had some symptoms, so i had asked him via text about it, but he got very very angry. he complained to Taylor and Kayla about it and said i “accused” him of mono)
Maria would tell me, literally everytime I went to go see her, about how all Kyle, Kayla and Taylor talk about is me. Maria said they would make jokes about how i probably “followed” kyle. She would tell me every single thing she heard them say about me. She was like “yeah, Kyle’s not a fan”.
Its just really not nice at all that they acted this way. I had real feelings for Kyle before, and we had some issues together that we between US. not the whole world. It was not Taylor’s place to keep bringing up stuff about us…When Kyle and i were a thing, we kept it secret. but i told taylor and another friend because i needed to tell someone about us. I told taylor not to tell anyone. But of course, once Kyle and i broke up, she told the whole world about how we hooked up….some friend….
Also, she told everyone that I was going to transfer out and go back to san francisco (where i am from), all beause of her. Yes, i was thinking of transferring out, but it wasnt cuz of her. Maria said she was telling everyone this and saying how she hoped i would transfer…
Once Maria and Eva became friends with Taylor again, and even Kyle, they stopped talking to me. I havent heard from them in nearly two months, and havent seen them in almost three. (and that was for dinner one night in the student center for a half hour)
Taylor apologized like two weeks ago on skype (a kid we were friends with over the summer told her recently to just apologize) saying “hey look, can we start over?” and saying how i was one of the people she regretted losing as a friend. she said she kinda backed off before, because she thought i wasnt her biggest fan. I told her i forgave her and stuff. But we hadnt talked originally since early october..
I havent heard from her in almost two weeks tho….so i dont think she is rushing to being my friend anyway….
But…should i even trust her?

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Sophomore In College Having A Hard Time Finding My Niche In College And Making A Close Group Of Friends…?


First of all, I’m not friendLESS, which is a good sign. However, I do not feel like I have a solid group of friends that provides that social stability/support. I am currently a (female) sophomore in college and I am having a hard time finding my niche or close group of friends in college. I feel like most people make their friends from their hallway freshmen year. Last year I got unlucky and lived in a dorm that attracted the types of people I specifically could never find myself being friends with–the superficial party animals. I also roomed with a girl who seemed to be on the same page as me (ie: neither of us fit in with the types of people who chose to live in this dorm) but she wasn’t interested in being friends with me for some odd reason, and grew to dislike me for almost no apparent reason.
I remember within the first week we both felt like everyone in my hall clicked off very quickly and before I knew it, both of us were alone, and she ended up transferring out after the first semester. Looking back, I kind of wish I had too because I didn’t fit in at all. But for some reason I thought if I stuck it out maybe it would get better.
So that explains largely why I didn’t make that many friends my freshman year when I “should have”. The school I’m attending also has about 50,000 undergrads, so it can be difficult to make the connections.
This year, I’m living in an apartment with random roommates (and will probably find myself, embarassingly, doing the same thing my junior year :/). While I have some friends, I want a stable group of friends, but I feel like all the upperclassmen already have a group of friends and aren’t looking for any more. Plus, it is difficult to break into an already formed social circle. My problem is, I have a lot of trouble following through with relationships and turning acquaintances into friends. I have people who I sit with in class, see at work, etc. but I have an extremely difficult time taking relationships to the next level. Its not that I’m that fearful of rejection, I feel like the whole process of asking to get food or hang out will be awkward. I’m also afraid that it isn’t appropriate to take things to the next level.
At this point, I feel like it is most critical to make friends because in the working world it’s even more difficult. I would even like to find a mate in college if possible, but I don’t know if that will happen or not either.
It just seems like everyone else has found their niche here and is comfortable with their adult life whereas I feel like I am just floating around without any stable social relationships to keep me grounded. Again, I am not in a position where I have zero friends. I do have one really good friend who I’d consider reliable. I have two other friends (who are also mutual friends with each other), but both of them are social butterflies so I really only feel like an option to them. So they’re not very reliable because they both already have their own separate group of friends.
What can I do to improve my confidence in my social life?

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Please Help What Should I Do?


Very long story, summed up.
So a few years ago a friend of mine and his brother had some rough family life and ended up living with us. Lets call them K and J. At the time J was still a minor (a month away from being 18) so for a while he was in the social services thingy and they determined it best for him to live with us since his brother (K) was already with us, plus he could go to the same school and all. AFter he lived with us for about 10 or so days we went to an outing out of town that we were all a part of. J hadn’t been affiliated with the group because his mom was nuts (that’s part of the family issues of theirs). For no reason during the outing J accused my dad of molesting him. It def never happened-I was there. But there was a police investigation and no charges were ever filed. But it was a living hell for a long time. That was all 3 years ago.
Here’s my dillema. If I have a single enemy in the world it would be J, and I think I’m justified in feeling that way. A good friend of mine (call her S) is now dating J. Her and J were friends years ago in high school and he treated her like crap and they bounced between being friends and hating each other. She knows about how he lied about that stuff 3 years ago. My and S are good friends but we havent talked, texted, or anything since she told me she was dating him. I really think that I miss her in my life. But I kind of feel betrayed. It’s messing with me. what should I do? please help.

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I’m So Lonely, Can Someone Please Just Talk To Me?


Please help me?
I’m a freshman in college and I’m miserable. For some reason, I can’t find a niche. I have a hard enough time as it is being social and fitting in as I have Asperger’s Syndrome. I’ve been long distance with my boyfriend (a sophomore in college) for two years and we have the normal ups and downs we’ve always had. But when I really need someone to talk to, I can’t always go to him. My three best friends from high school are at schools very far from me and all have seemed to easily adapt to college.
My roommate (sort of a social outcast, like myself) was friends with me at the beginning of fall semester but gradually began to draw within herself and dropped out over winter break. I have several friends here but none are very close. The other girls on my floor seem to make fun of me and disrespect me a lot, though I’ve done nothing to them and honestly tried being friends.
I’m so lonely so often lately and I really can’t take it. Especially since spring semester started, everyone seems to have all their friendships established already and I feel like such a loser. I’m doing well in my classes but have no classes with the few friends I have. I mostly eat alone because my schedule doesn’t seem fit with mine and they often forgot to ask me to go to eat with them.
Please help?

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